Daughter's first salary lands this month. Do we ask her to contribute at home?

apricot_violin_7891

She started her first job in July and lives with us. Her first full month's salary comes at the end of August. My partner is on a planned break this year and we're managing comfortably on savings and my income, so we don't need the money. The question is more about habit. My parents took a fixed amount from my first salary. I resented it at the time and understood it later. My partner thinks she should save all of it this first year. She hasn't brought it up herself. If you asked, how much was it and what was it for? Groceries, a bill, a fixed amount?

7 comments

  • pebble_quilt_6246

    mine is still in school so this is far off, but i like the idea of her owning one bill completely. the internet, or her own phone. small enough not to hurt, real enough that she notices when it's due

  • pebble_drum_468

    Speaking as the daughter in this situation, years ago: my appa never asked for anything, but he did quietly tell me to start a recurring deposit before I got used to the money. Best advice I got. Whatever you decide, maybe make the saving part automatic first.

  • peach_kite_4505

    My brother and I both gave our mother a fixed amount from our first salaries. Not because she needed it. She kept every rupee in a separate account and handed it back to each of us when we got married. I didn't know until then.

  • basil_compass_1539

    Ask her what she thinks is fair. She might surprise you. Imposing a number at 21 sets up an argument you don't need.

  • saffron_window_1258

    Mine is still in middle school, but this exact discussion happened at my brother's house last year. They left it open, and my niece started buying the monthly groceries on her own. Evaru adagaledu, nobody had to say a word. Some children just need to see that the house costs money.

  • ivory_kite_6109

    Son started earning from a part-time role this year. We asked for nothing and asked him to tell us what he saves each month. He tells us. That's been enough for now.

  • breezy_paper_4500

    mine are 10 and 12 so years off. noting all of this though. my 12 yr old already charges her sister for borrowing pencils, so i suspect she'll be the one sending us an invoice 😄

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