Our daughter is 2 months old. We split the night: I take 10 to 2, my partner takes 2 to 6, and we swap on weekends. I have customer demos two or three mornings a week and I'm useless in them after a broken night. My partner suggested I skip my shift before demo days. Feels unfair on my partner. Is that how others managed it, or did you find a different split?
My daughter is 17 now. When she was a baby I was on the road four days a week, so her mother carried most of the nights. What I regret is not taking more of the weekend ones. If your partner is offering, accept it on demo days, but give it back on the other nights. Your partner will remember who showed up.
With our younger one we stopped splitting by the clock and split by the day instead. Whoever had the harder next morning slept through, and the other took the whole night. Fewer handovers, less resentment. It only works if you're both honest about whose morning is actually hard.
We tried a fixed split too. Our problem was that 2 to 6 is far worse than 10 to 2, because that's when ours is hardest to settle. If you do take fewer nights, maybe take the 2 to 6 on the ones you keep.
I'm a chef and my shift ends after midnight, so the night shift was never possible for me. When our son was born I took 5 to 9 in the morning instead, before work, and my wife slept then. Not the same, but it helped her a lot.
Right, 2 to 6 is the bad one for us also. Will offer to take that on the non-demo nights. Thanks.
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