Weekly 'family meeting' with a 12 year old, when the family is just the two of us

citrus_pool_98164 May 2026

Every parenting article I have read this year recommends a weekly family meeting. An agenda, everyone speaks, decisions written down. I can see the appeal. I can also see it turning into a formal review of my son by his mother, which neither of us needs. In our house it is me and my 12 year old, with help coming in during the day. If you do something like this, what does it look like on an ordinary Sunday? How long, what gets discussed, and who decides what goes on the list?

2 comments

peach_balcony_84704 May 2026
Ours is not a meeting, more a Sunday chai with a notebook 🙂 Two of us also, me and my 7 year old. She gets to put one thing on the list, I get one thing. Last week hers was 'more mango', mine was 'shoes go on the rack'. Ten minutes max. The day it starts feeling like a meeting, she'll stop coming, bas.
- citrus_pool_98167 May 2026
  We tried your version last night instead of waiting for Sunday. One item each, ten minutes, tea for me and juice for him. His item was a request that I stop asking about homework at dinner. Mine was the wet towel on the bed. We agreed to both, which I suspect was a negotiated settlement rather than a meeting of minds. He has asked to keep the notebook.
peach_notebook_29327 May 2026
What problem is it meant to solve? If it's talking, the dinner table already does that. If it's chores and rules, a list on the fridge does it with less ceremony. The articles rarely say.