Our 12 year old wants to volunteer at a centre for disabled children this summer. Is that fair on them?

ivory_kettle_439711 May 2026

Her friend's elder sister did it and talked about it at a sleepover. Now our daughter wants to spend two weeks of the holidays helping at a centre near us. I like that she wants to do something useful. My hesitation is about the children there. A twelve year old arriving for two weeks and leaving again doesn't sound obviously good for them, and I don't want her treating it as a project or a certificate. On the other hand, refusing feels like teaching her that disability is something to keep at a distance. Has anyone's child done something like this at this age? What did the centre let them do?

3 comments

cobalt_sparrow_326411 May 2026
The practical side first: the couple of centres I've come across through work don't let under-16s do direct work with the children. She'd more likely be preparing materials, sorting the library, setting up rooms for sessions. That's still useful to them. Have you already spoken to a centre? I'd ask them what they need rather than what she can do. She sounds like a kind kid ❤️
- citrus_piano_900011 May 2026
  Agree. From the other side: I teach IB, and every year centres get flooded with students who need service hours. The ones who are welcome are the ones who keep coming back, even an hour a week, rather than two intense weeks. Not saying that's your daughter, just how it looks from where I sit 🤷
coral_drum_445211 May 2026
My daughter asked about something similar last year. The centre we contacted wanted a parent along for the first visit and a minimum of one session a week for three months, so the children would see the same face. We couldn't commit to that, so we didn't go ahead. I don't know whether that's typical or just their rule.
willow_camera_222711 May 2026
Two weeks isn't nothing. I'd ask her what she imagines doing there. If the answer is 'teaching' or 'playing with the kids', that's a conversation worth having before you ring anyone. If it's 'whatever they need', she's probably ready.