Special Needs & Inclusion

New boy in my son's class is visually impaired. My son wants to help and keeps getting it wrong

citrus_pool_9816

A boy who is visually impaired joined my son's class 7 section this term. My son likes him and has appointed himself the helper, which so far has meant taking his arm to steer him down the corridor, reading the board aloud when nobody asked, and finishing his sentences when he's slow to find something in his bag. The boy has been polite about it. On Friday he told my son, quite clearly, that he'd rather do things himself. My son came home hurt and confused. I'd like to help my son understand what useful support looks like, without lecturing him or making him feel he can't be friends with this boy. If your child has been through this, what did you say to them?

7 comments

  • umber_moon_5623

    the fact that the boy said it to him directly is a good sign. means he sees your son as a friend he can be straight with, not a stranger he has to be polite to

  • mint_hammock_2341

    I'd give him the simplest rule: ask first, then do what he says. 'Want me to read that?' and if the answer is no, that's the answer. He's 12, he'll get it. The hurt feelings are the harder bit.

  • coral_sparrow_1392

    We had a girl with low vision in my daughter's class a couple of years ago. What helped the kids most was when the girl's mother came in and explained what was useful and what wasn't, with the girl there. Could the class teacher set up something similar? Better than every parent coaching their own child separately.

  • mango_marigold_3239

    What exactly did the boy say? 'I'd rather do it myself' about everything, or about the arm? Those need different conversations.

  • mellow_crayon_8476

    Something like this happened with my daughter in class 5. A classmate used a wheelchair and she kept pushing it without asking. I told her treat him like your other friends, if he needs something he will tell you. She was upset for one day, then fine. Children forgive each other faster than we think.

  • breezy_veranda_1979

    Your son taking his arm came from a kind place. I'd tell him that first, before anything about what to change. Then maybe let him ask the boy what helps. Kids that age take it better from each other than from us ❤

  • amber_badminton_210

    Please update when you can? My son would do exactly the same at his age. I'd like to know which words worked.

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