Parenting & Family

Grandparents want our 2 year old's ears pierced before Diwali

indigo_marigold_7034

Both sets of grandparents have brought it up this month. In their view it should have been done at one and we're already late. My partner leans towards waiting until our daughter can decide for herself. I'm somewhere in the middle, mostly because I don't see the hurry. Nobody is being unreasonable, it has just become a topic on every family call. If you waited, how did you handle the family? And if you did it early, any regrets either way?

4 comments

  • rose_marigold_8535

    What is the actual objection: pain, infection risk, or that she can't agree to it? Those have different answers, and the family will keep arguing past you until you know which one it is for you.

  • bronze_kite_7134

    Not even born yet and my mother has already asked which month we're planning it for. Reading this with interest. My current plan is to say 'we'll decide later' until later actually arrives.

  • plum_puzzle_3010

    Our daughter had hers done at about one, because that was the family custom and we didn't think hard about it. She's 16 now, doesn't remember any of it, and has been choosing her own earrings since she was ten. I don't think either path is wrong. The pressure fades once it's done or once you're clearly not doing it; it's the in-between that drags.

    • quiet_rain_417

      the in between is the worst part. in our family boys get it done too, at the temple. we kept postponing for our son and finally just said 'when he asks'. he's 9 and hasn't asked. relatives stopped asking around age 5 🤷

  • mint_diary_7678

    our elder did it at 8 because she wanted to match a friend. younger one refused till 9 and then wanted it the same week as her best friend. grandparents survived both

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