When my son falls, he runs to the caregiver now. I am standing right there

amber_wave_98914 May 2026

Last Sunday he tripped on the society stairs and scraped his knee. I was a step behind him, and I am, of all things, a doctor. He walked straight past me to the caregiver, who had come in for half a day, and let only her clean it. My partner says it is natural; on weekdays the caregiver spends more waking hours with him than either of us. I agree with that in my head. I would still like to know whether other parents with long hours went through this, and whether it changed as the child got older.

3 comments

apricot_notebook_470814 May 2026
I work in hospital administration, so I see the roster side of this every day. Most of the senior doctors I know have some version of your story. One of them told me his son only started coming to him for scrapes once he took over the bedtime routine on his off days, even just two nights a week. Small regular things seemed to count for more than big weekends. We are in the middle of moving to Hyderabad this month, and my daughter has attached herself to her grandmother for much the same reason, so I am reading the replies here for myself too.
mellow_crayon_847614 May 2026
When my daughter was young, I was going for client visits in the evenings and my mother looked after her. For two or three years she went to her ammamma for everything, even for fever. I felt bad. Now she is 13 and she fights with me about everything, so you can see she came back to me for that also. It changes. Don't take it to heart.
- amber_wave_98914 May 2026
  That made me laugh, thank you. So if I am patient, I will eventually be the one he argues with.
- willow_violin_368714 May 2026
  This is reassuring to read. Mine is still a baby and already goes quiet for my aunt in a way he doesn't for me. I had decided not to mind. Now I'll try a little harder not to.
umber_balcony_70014 May 2026
One thing I'd add from the other end of it. Our daughter went to her grandmother for every scraped knee until she was about eight. What she remembers now, at 22, is that I was the one who sat with her in the clinic when she needed stitches once. Children seem to sort comfort into different kinds. The caregiver may be the everyday kind. That doesn't use up the rest.