She won't move up to the advanced swim group because her friend isn't moving

mint_bottle_542122 Aug 2026

My daughter and her friend have been in the same swimming batch for two years. The coach wants to move my daughter to the advanced group from September. The friend is staying where she is. My daughter has refused. She says she'll swim slowly on purpose if we make her. Forcing it feels wrong, but she is clearly bored in the current group and spends half the class hanging on the lane rope. Do I let her stay for the friendship, or is this one of those times a parent should push?

2 comments

olive_badminton_267222 Aug 2026
What does the advanced group look like in practice? Same time and pool, or a different slot? If it's the same session in the next lane, that's a much smaller ask than a new timing.
mango_bookmark_283023 Aug 2026
We had nearly the same thing with my son and football, he wouldn't leave his friend's level. We agreed he could stay one more term if he tried the higher group's session once a month. By the second month the friend had discovered cricket and it sorted itself out 💛 Not saying that will happen to you, but giving her a date rather than a decision helped him.
- mint_bottle_542124 Aug 2026
  The advanced group is the next lane, same time, which made it easier. The coach suggested she swims with them on Saturdays only for now. She agreed, on the condition that her friend watches. Fine by me.