Class 12 daughter says our reminders are the reason she can't concentrate

teal_compass_487013 Oct 2026

My older daughter is in class 12 and studies late most nights. October and November are our busiest months at work because of festival orders, so I'm home late, and my partner, who is on a career break, has become the person who checks on her. 'Have you started physics?' 'How many chapters left?' That sort of thing, a few times a day. Last night she said it feels like having a supervisor and she can't settle because she's waiting for the next question. My partner was hurt. I can see both sides. I'd rather find out from the school what a reasonable evening load looks like than make another timetable for her. Has anyone asked a class teacher about this, and what did you ask?

2 comments

cinnamon_pebble_373013 Oct 2026
What do the reminders consist of? In our house the reminders were mostly about whether a chapter had been started, which is the one thing I couldn't tell from the outside. Once my older one started writing the day's plan on a sheet on the fridge, the questions mostly stopped because the answer was already there. She's only in class 8, so the stakes are lower, but the pattern might be similar.
ochre_pool_75513 Oct 2026
I teach at a CBSE school, so I'm answering from the other side of the table. Parents asking about workload is completely normal and most teachers would rather hear it in October than in February. A specific question works best. Ask for the test calendar for the next two months and roughly how long the daily homework is meant to take. Then the house has something to go by other than guessing. Also, if she's in class 12, she probably knows her own backlog better than anyone. A once-a-day check at a fixed time might land better than lots of small ones.