Back to outstation demos and I feel like a guest at my baby's bedtime

lagoon_piano_99278 Sept 2026

Daughter is 7 months. I've started travelling again for client demos, mostly two nights a week, sometimes three. My partner is home on a career break and is very good with her. Their bedtime routine is a whole thing now, a specific song, a specific way of holding her. When I'm home I try to do it and she fusses until my partner takes over. Amma says it's normal and she'll come back to me. I know that in my head, but it still stings a little 🙂

4 comments

velvet_wave_27278 Sept 2026
That feeling eased for me once there was one thing that stayed mine regardless of travel. In our case it was the morning bath; whoever did bedtime, the bath was me. It didn't fix the bedtime part, but it stopped me feeling like a visitor.
hazel_veranda_85108 Sept 2026
How many nights a week are you away on average? Two and four are very different situations for a baby that age.
- lagoon_piano_99279 Sept 2026
  Mostly two, sometimes three in a bad month. Not every week also, some weeks I'm in Bangalore throughout.
lagoon_compass_23229 Sept 2026
Early theatre lists meant I missed most mornings for years. My son is 9 now and still goes to his father for some things and to me for others. It settled into that, not into me being a guest. Give it a few months.
linen_violin_169210 Sept 2026
My partner travelled a great deal when our daughter was a baby. The one thing I'd say from the other side, as the parent at home more, is that I tried not to guard the routine. Whoever had been away did bedtime their own way on the nights home, even when it ran late and the baby protested. It may be worth saying that to your partner directly, rather than waiting for the routine to be handed over.