My mother has offered to take over our son's after-school hours. I'm not sure it's good for either of them

linen_pigeon_651014 Apr 2026

He goes to a small after-school centre near home three days a week. It works, mostly. My mother has offered to have him at her place instead, so that he 'eats properly' and we stop paying. She's in her seventies with a bad knee, and he is not a quiet child. She means it kindly, and she would be hurt by a no. Has anyone moved after-school care to a grandparent and then had to move it back? How did you handle that conversation?

1 comment

juniper_sketch_757514 Apr 2026
my parents offered the same for our son before we chose daycare. we said no, mostly so i'd never have to tell them it wasn't working. still can't decide if that was a fair reason. and a baby is a different job from a school kid
- lilac_camera_236514 Apr 2026
  Fair reason, I'd say. From the other side of it: my grandson is with me three afternoons a week, by agreement with his parents, and what makes it work is that it's fixed and it's limited. Anyone in this spot should start with one or two days rather than all three, and agree up front that anyone can call a pause without it being a verdict on the grandparent. The hard conversations are the ones nobody planned for.