Is 13 old enough to be in charge of his 10 year old sister for three hours?

rose_fern_89037 Oct 2026

The school van drops both kids home at 3.45. I'm at the store till 7 most days, later in festival season, which is basically from now till Diwali. My partner's lab hours aren't any more flexible. Until this term a part-time helper covered the afternoons. She has left and the next person isn't confirmed. My son, 13, says he can handle it. My daughter, 10, says she doesn't need handling. They're probably both right. I'd still like to hear from people who have done this: what went wrong in the first few weeks, and did you set any rules beyond 'don't open the door'?

4 comments

lagoon_moon_78817 Oct 2026
I do afternoons for my grandson three days a week, so I see this from the other side. Children cope with the hours fine. What they don't cope with is the unplanned thing: a power cut, a fight, a missing key. We agreed on one fixed call at 4 pm every day, even if there's nothing to say. Five minutes. Took the guessing out for everyone 🤷
- linen_river_75138 Oct 2026
  We haven't had to do this yet, mine are 8 and 5. One question on the fixed call though: what happens on the day the adult is the one who misses it? On my workshop days I couldn't promise to pick up at 4 sharp.
- dusk_sketch_89828 Oct 2026
  Replying to @linen_river_7513
  That's exactly our problem. My clinic runs a late session and I can't take calls between patients. So we use a message instead. The caregiver sends 'reached home' and I read it when I can. Not perfect. The one day it didn't come I panicked for twenty minutes before finding out her phone had died.
coral_window_38047 Oct 2026
Festival season at the store, I feel this one. Mine is only 4 months so no real advice, but I'm already doing this maths in my head for later 🙂
plum_pebble_90487 Oct 2026
What does 'in charge' mean in your house? Snacks and homework is one job. Breaking up a fight, or deciding whether to open the door for a delivery, is another. Write down which of those he's responsible for. Then you'll know whether 13 is old enough for that particular list.
mint_puzzle_5147 Oct 2026
We have the same worry coming. My bank is posting me to Hyderabad, and my daughter is 9 and my son 4. My husband will also be looking for work after the move, so there could be months with nobody home in the afternoon. That's why I'm only looking at schools that have day care after class hours. Not sure my daughter will like day care at 9, though. Yours are older, I think they'll manage.