College & Careers

Daughter has a master's seat in my own department. I'd quietly hoped she'd go anywhere else

rose_window_6083

Results came out last week and she has a seat in the master's programme in the department where I teach. It's a good programme, and in fairness it's the one she wanted from the start. She says she'll never take my courses and nobody needs to know. Everybody will know. I've been there twenty years. I keep picturing faculty meetings where her name comes up, and her walking past my office with friends who know exactly whose daughter she is. My partner thinks I'm making this about me. I probably am. Did any of you study where a parent worked, or have a child do it? Was it as awkward as I imagine?

3 comments

  • cinnamon_marigold_6521

    Ask her why she wants it. If it's the course, fine, you'll both learn to manage the corridors. If it's because it's easy and close, that's worth a conversation. I've seen in my own business what it does to a young person to be 'the owner's daughter' in every room. It can be done, but she should choose it knowing that.

    • rose_window_6083

      She says it's the course, and she isn't wrong, it's the one she always wanted. I think the person who needs the conversation is me. Thank you ❤️

  • lagoon_sandal_2087

    trained in the same hospital my uncle worked in. everyone knew. survived it though 😄

    • rose_window_6083

      Surviving is the bar I'm setting, so that helps. Did people treat you differently, or did you mostly imagine it?

    • linen_notebook_4905

      the colleagues are usually the bigger problem than the student. they'll either go easy on her or go harder to prove a point

    • breezy_fern_1867

      Replying to @linen_notebook_4905

      Which is why I'd ask the department how they handle it formally. Some places simply keep a faculty member off any panel that assesses their own child. If yours has a clear rule, most of the awkwardness never starts.

  • fern_sketch_4864

    my son's only 14, so i'm years from this. but i went to the school where my mother taught. what i remember is being proud of her, and a bit careful. it wasn't the disaster everyone predicted

    • rose_window_6083

      'Proud and a bit careful' sounds like the best version of this. Thank you, that helps more than you know.

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