Our caregiver and our helper each think packing the school bag is the other one's job

amber_window_958815 Sept 2026

We have a caregiver who's with our daughter after school and a part-time helper who comes in the mornings. Neither of them packs the school bag. Each is very polite about it and quite sure it's the other person's job. The result is me checking a timetable at 11 pm after my US calls, which nobody, including my daughter, thinks is ideal. She's 9 and could pack it herself, in theory. In practice we've had a forgotten notebook twice this week. Do you give this sort of thing explicitly to one adult, or hand it to the kid and let the consequences happen?

1 comment

bronze_lantern_951315 Sept 2026
With a toddler our version is the daycare bag, and my partner and I had the same standoff until it went on a written list on the fridge with a name next to each item. I'd be a little wary of handing it entirely to a 9 year old during exam weeks, though. One forgotten notebook in a normal week is a lesson. On a test day it's just stress for everyone.
- hazel_marigold_275115 Sept 2026
  Lists work right up until the person on the list takes a day off. Then you're back to 11 pm.
- amber_window_958815 Sept 2026
  the list exists. it's on the fridge. it has my name on it, which is probably the problem. going to try giving the bag to her and the checking to the caregiver, and see who blinks first